Dear Mr. Galifianakis,
You are super funny! You should be a big star, but you'll never be a household name with a moniker like "Zach Galifianakis." Have you thought about using a stage name? Here are some suggestions:
- Zack Galifianakis
- Jeb Galifianakis
- Biff Galifianakis
- Shecky Galifianakis
- Ignatz Galifianakis
- Galifianakis the Great
- Captain Ha-Ha
P.S. - You could always go by "Weirdo Beardo."
P.P.S. - I've enclosed my picture. Please send me your picture. You can sign it any way you wanna.
My thoughts are with you.
A Note From Weasel Regarding The Reply:
Thank you, Mr. Galifianakis, for saying your thoughts are with me. However, since you have some pretty odd thoughts, that may not be entirely good.