An Explanation:
Weasel McPuppy is a real dog, and the posts below are real letters sent from her to celebrities via snail mail. A self-addressed stamped envelope was included with each letter to encourage a reply. If and when Weasel receives a response, the post will be updated with the full correspondence.
Dear Ms. Poppins,
A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down, but what if that medicine is insulin? I bet ya didn't think of that, Miss Practically Perfect.
Your friend,
Weasel McPuppy
P.S. - Nannying is great and all; but maybe you should focus your magical powers on the financial crisis or the turmoil in the Middle East.
P.P.S. - Please send me your picture. I've enclosed my picture. As you can see, I'm also practically perfect in every way.
The Reply:
Sincerely,
Julie Andrews
A Note From Weasel Regarding The Reply:
Thank you for the lovely picture, Ms. Andrews. You are practically perfect in every way.
Dear Mr. Lewis,
I think your pantomime scenes are brilliant. You should shut up more often.
Your friend,
Weasel McPuppy
P.S. - I meant that as a compliment, but I'm not sure it came out right. I really think your idiocy is unsurpassed.
P.P.S. - I don't think that came out right either. Oh well. I've enclosed my picture. Please send me your picture.
The Reply:
To Weasel--
from Paulie--
(& his Dad, Jerry Lewis)
'09
A Note From Weasel Regarding The Reply:
Hey Paaaaauuuullliiieee! Did I sound like your daddy?
Thank you for the great picture, and please thank your daddy as well.
Dear Ms. Duke,
Does a hot dog still make you lose control? That sounds kinda dirty.
Your friend,
Weasel McPuppy
P.S. - French fries make me lose control.
P.P.S. - I've enclosed my picture. Please send me your picture... and maybe one of your identical cousin.
Dear Bad Santa,
I got bupkis from the real Santa Claus last year, so this year I'm writing you. Please leave a bottle of gin in my stocking. I've been a very good girl this year, so I think I deserve the good stuff.
Happy Holidays,
Weasel McPuppy
P.S. - I'd also like a Fraggle Stick Car.
P.P.S. - If you end up drinkin' the gin yourself, at least send me your picture. I've enclosed my picture.
Dear President-elect Obama,
Congratulations on your historic win! I hope my
endorsement played a small part in your victory.
By the way, I hear you will be getting a puppy for your daughters, Malia and Sasha. Did you know that Maltese doggies are extremely cute and lovable? Hint, hint.
Your friend,
Weasel Hussein McPuppy
P.S. - Maltese are also smart, loyal, and can hold their liquor.
P.P.S. - I've been hearing some Labrador rumors, but I don't believe 'em.
Happy birthday to me! I turn 12 years old today. I'd think twice about making any wisecracks about dog years. My bite is worse than my bark.
By the way, if you don't know what to get me for my special day, Plymouth Gin is my favorite. It's s-m-o-o-t-h!
I received a reply from a wonderful woman. Make that Wonder Woman!
To see my letter to Lynda Carter and to read her response, click here-->
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