To Crystal Gayle

Dear Ms. Gayle,

I hear that your hair reaches all the way to the floor. What do you do with it when you go to the bathroom?

Just wondering,

Weasel McPuppy

P.S. - Do you throw it over your face like Cousin It?

P.P.S. - I've enclosed my picture. Please send me your picture. Be sure to move your hair so I can see if your brown eyes are blue.

To Jim Belushi

Dear Mr. Belushi,

I hear that According to Jim has been picked up for an eighth season. Tell me the truth; did you make a deal with the devil?

Just wondering,

Weasel McPuppy

P.S. - In the world "according to Weasel," your show has been canceled, and Arrested Development is the most popular show on television.

P.P.S. - I've enclosed my picture. Please send me your picture. Another season? Really?

The Hamburglar's Spokesperson Responds

Today I received a reply from a spokesperson for the Hamburglar. The Hamburglar has a spokesperson?

To read my letter to the Hamburglar and to read the reply, click here-->Link

Dom DeLuise Responds

Today Mr. Dom DeLuise sent me a beautiful autographed photo. He truly is Dominick the Great.

To read my letter to Mr. DeLuise and to see his reply, click here-->Link

To Dr. Phil

Dear Dr. Phil,

You say some pretty dumb things. Do you really have a doctorate, or are you like Dr. J?

Your friend,

Weasel McPuppy

P.S. - Do you have a ruthless dunk?

P.P.S. - Please send me your picture. I've enclosed my picture. I have a little bit of a mustache too.

To the Hamburglar

Dear Hamburglar,

Robble-robble. Robble, robble robble robble robble robble robble... robble. Robble-robble-robble. Robble.

Your robble-robble friend,

Weasel McPuppy

P.S. - Robble-robble. Robble robble reward-robble. Robble-lam.

P.P.S. - I've enclosed my robble-robble picture. Robble-please send me your robble-picture, robble.


The Reply:


Dear Weasel McPuppy,

Thank you so much for sending us a picture of you. The smile on your McPuppy face made us smile too! Unfortunately, we have been trying to track down photos of the Hamburglar for a while, with no luck. It seems the rascal has burgled his photos as well as McDonald's hamburgers. The Hamburglar is having fun romping around McDonaldland. Hopefully, someday soon when he isn't so camera-shy, we can snap a quick photo before he makes a get-away. But as you may know Weasel McPuppy, that Hamburglar is a quick one! Again, thank you for contacting us and we hope you have a robble-robble wonderful summer!

Your McFriend,

Kerri Redd
McDonald's Corporation
Customer Satisfaction Department


A Note From Weasel Regarding The Reply:

Thanks for taking the time to write to a little doggy. If you can't get a good photo of the Hamburglar, please send French fries!